My life has been quite an adventure. It has been marked with high highs and low lows. Much more lows than highs. And I have been lower than low, to the deepest depths you can go, a couple of times.
Most of that was done to me, stuff that happened to me, to the world around me, because of choices other people made on my behalf, or made for their lives which simply affected mine. And some was because of choices I made.
For the longest time I felt like God’s punching bag. Like He was mad at someone or something and took it out on me. I felt that I bore the brunt of His wrath. In contrast, I also felt that I was super special to Him. That He thought me worthy of His attention and strong enough to carry this heavy burden of a life that He chose for me. And, also, because no matter what happened to me, I was always cared for. There has always been a way out, a solution…
Only lately have I realised just how protected I am and have been my entire life. Bad stuff that happened to others, never happened to me. To a very high degree, although I suffered from a lot that others didn’t, I was shielded from a lot of things that “normal” people go through. Like a barrier was constantly around me, blocking me from seeing bad things, and blocking bad stuff from outside to affect me. When you consider all that happened to me and what I have been through, I should have been in a mental institution. My hair should have been grey. I actually should have been dead.
But I am not.
I also thought that perhaps this continuous suffering in my life, is simply the cards that I have been dealt. This is what my life was planned to be. And it is not going to get better. It is always going to be like this. Struggling. Suffering. Worrying. Filled with uncertainty. Hovering on the brink of poverty. Just, not good. This created a rebellion within me, where I fought with God. Why am my life so miserable? What have I done to deserve this? I was drowning in misery.
Then, after speaking to various people, it was concluded that I was suffering under curses. Apparently, the bad luck that I have, is much more than “normal” or “average” and constitutes curses that is active in my life. So, I began searching and asking and knocking and pleading and praying to find those curses and break them, so that this suffering could end.
It has not.
We have all been groomed to think that God’s blessings are materialistic. O, we know it’s not. Yet, for some reason, we expect blessings in materialistic forms. So, to be constantly poor, is because there is still something that has a hold over you, like a curse, and it needs to be broken, so your financial situation can change. Same with health, or other issues. When things constantly go wrong, we believe it is because God is not blessing us. We are still in the wrong somewhere.
What does the Bible say about how our lives should be? Consider these verses:
James 1:12 – Blessed is the man that endureth temptation: for when he is tried, he shall receive the crown of life, which the Lord hath promised to them that love him.
1 Pet 1:7 – That the trial of your faith, being much more precious than of gold that perisheth, though it be tried with fire, might be found unto praise and honour and glory at the appearing of Jesus Christ:
1 Pet 4:12 – Beloved, think it not strange concerning the fiery trial which is to try you, as though some strange thing happened unto you:
John 16:33 – These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.
Deut 4:30-31 – When thou art in tribulation, and all these things are come upon thee, even in the latter days, if thou turn to the Lord thy God, and shalt be obedient unto his voice;(For the Lord thy God is a merciful God;) he will not forsake thee, neither destroy thee, nor forget the covenant of thy fathers which he sware unto them.
Acts 14:22 – Confirming the souls of the disciples, and exhorting them to continue in the faith, and that we must through much tribulation enter into the kingdom of God.
Rom 5:3 – And not only so, but we glory in tribulations also: knowing that tribulation worketh patience;
1 Peter 3:14 – But and if ye suffer for righteousness’ sake, happy are ye: and be not afraid of their terror, neither be troubled;
Romans 8:17 – And if children, then heirs; heirs of God, and joint-heirs with Christ; if so be that we suffer with him, that we may be also glorified together.
Phil 1:29 – For unto you it is given in the behalf of Christ, not only to believe on him, but also to suffer for his sake;
2 Tim 3:12 – Yea, and all that will live godly in Christ Jesus shall suffer persecution.
1 Peter 3:14 – But and if ye suffer for righteousness’ sake, happy are ye: and be not afraid of their terror, neither be troubled;
We are not supposed to have it easy here!! If you are not suffering some form of hardship, trial or tribulation, you are not walking with God. If you want to live godly, you WILL suffer persecution.
These verses do not paint the picture of bliss, ignorance and happiness, flowers and sunshine, with rainbows and butterflies… No, it is dark, filled with warnings of hardships. In fact, we are to suffer with Christ. Remember what He went through? Flogged, beaten, spat on, reviled, mocked… crucified?
How does your suffering compare?
God confirmed that my sufferings are indeed because of my walk with Him in the most beautiful and personal way. Yes, I still have a long walk to walk. I still have loads of sin to deal with, forgiveness to extend and iniquities to get rid of. And yes, there are probably still a couple of curses to break. Knowing this does not end my journey. I still need to continue on my journey of sanctification, to become clean, to be rid of sin. I cannot write all the bad stuff off as trials because of my faith, as I will still be disciplined by God for disobedience, unforgiveness, iniquities and sins.
But my circumstances are not only because of my sin.
It is also because I want to live godly, because I gave my life to Christ Jesus so He can do with it as He wishes. And my faith has been tried and is being tried and will be tried, until the day He returns gloriously again in the clouds, surrounded by the angels.
No doubt I will fall flat on my face and cry desperately in despair when bad luck strikes at the most inopportune time again. Knowing that your faith is being tried, does not make the trying any easier!
1 Pet 4: 12-13 says it very clearly: Beloved, think it not strange concerning the fiery trial which is to try you, as though some strange thing happened unto you:But rejoice, inasmuch as ye are partakers of Christ’s sufferings; that, when his glory shall be revealed, ye may be glad also with exceeding joy.
We are to rejoice because of our fiery trials! With exceeding joy!
Read Acts 16. Paul and Silas was thrown into prison. And it was only when they started to sing and to praise God, that their chains fell off. And not only theirs, but everyone else who was in prison with them.
Praising God is a mighty and powerful weapon against the enemy.
Praising God during trials and tribulations, even more so. When the enemy tortures you, don’t look at the waves around you, don’t stare at the flames engulfing you… look up! Give glory to the Almighty God in whose hands you are.
God’s blessings are not material. Do not judge His goodness by the number of zeros in your bank account, by the type of car you drive or the size of your house, nor by the success of your business or the pace of your promotions.
I think I’d rather strive for His promises of exceeding joy, peace beyond understanding, life abundantly, and hearing the words: “Well done, thou good and faithful servant!”
